There was once a woman married to a man who would make extremely loud and disgusting farts every morning as soon as he woke up.
Every day, she pleaded with him to stop, but he would just reply, "One day it's going to be me first!"
This went on for years until finally, the woman couldn't take it anymore.
She decided to take matters into her own hands.
One morning, as her husband lay in bed letting one rip, she got out of bed, went downstairs, and cooked up a batch of super spicy chili.
Later that day, her husband came downstairs looking pale and shaken. "What's wrong?" she asked innocently.
He replied, "You were right. For years, you warned me and I didn't listen.
But today, finally, you were right. You were first... the dog farted, and I woke up in the yard!